{"id":748,"date":"2015-12-15T10:55:44","date_gmt":"2015-12-15T10:55:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/?p=748"},"modified":"2016-01-04T21:25:50","modified_gmt":"2016-01-04T21:25:50","slug":"lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/","title":{"rendered":"Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s an all-dog post today, before we drift back to some stupendous weird art and illustrators. We present some of the <em>greydogs<\/em> pack, and offer you<\/p>\n<h3>A Morning With: J Linseed Grant<\/h3>\n<p>Being a writer isn&#8217;t all about exciting awards ceremonies and expensive yachts. Today we are delighted to be joined by man-about-town, fashion icon and millionaire recluse, <span style=\"color: #800000;\"><strong>J Linseed Grant<\/strong><\/span>, who shares with us some insights into his whirlwind life.<\/p>\n<p>The author of the notorious dark-horror novel <strong>&#8216;Sandra&#8217;s First Pony&#8217;<\/strong> (currently under investigation by three separate Congressional Committees), Mr Grant spoke to us at his palatial North Yorkshire mansion. We asked him to outline a typical morning with his beloved hounds. The hounds themselves, <strong>Django, Chilli<\/strong> and <strong>Twiglet<\/strong>, have not been named for legal reasons&#8230;<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_756\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-756\" style=\"width: 430px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"756\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/pups3-2\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=1386%2C856&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1386,856\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"pups3\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=300%2C185&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=474%2C293&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-756\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?resize=430%2C265\" alt=\"pups3\" width=\"430\" height=\"265\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?resize=300%2C185&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?resize=1024%2C632&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?w=1386&amp;ssl=1 1386w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?w=948 948w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 430px) 100vw, 430px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-756\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">the start of a busy morning<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><strong><em>(A note for delicate listeners: We have to admit that the following tale of terror might be entirely true, unlike some of our usual\u00a0 bunkum.)<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>0845<\/strong>. <em><strong>Whine whine whine<\/strong>.<\/em> Longdogs are bored. Try to go back to sleep with pillow over head.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0900<\/strong>. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>. Longdogs are still bored. Push one or more dogs off the bed, get up. Go downstairs, tread in pee patch. Incontinent labrador.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0910<\/strong>. Sit at computer with pint of tea. Adobe plug-in has crashed. Check e-mails sent out at 0230hrs (under influence of <em>Spitfire Ale<\/em>) for libellous comments, wrong e-mail addresses etc. Ring solicitor to say she may be earning extra this week.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0920<\/strong>. Lift tea to lips. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Incontinent labrador needs helping down stairs. Due to dodgy vertebrae of both participants, perform morning ritual of kneeling on each step and letting dog tumble down in stages. One or both of us hits head on front door.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_758\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-758\" style=\"width: 411px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"758\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/olympus-digital-camera\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?fit=1126%2C844&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1126,844\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;2.8&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;X-3,C-60Z&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1117201063&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;7.8&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;100&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.033333333333333&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"&lt;p&gt;OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA&lt;\/p&gt;\n\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?fit=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?fit=474%2C356&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-758\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?resize=411%2C308\" alt=\"\" width=\"411\" height=\"308\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?w=1126&amp;ssl=1 1126w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/twiglet1.jpg?w=948 948w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 411px) 100vw, 411px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-758\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">a disappointed girl with empty cuppa<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>0922<\/strong>. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>. Longdogs think sound at front door is signal for going out. All rush downstairs. Step in pee again. Go up to get shoes. Longdogs think this is also signal for going out. All rush upstairs. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Incontinent labrador thinks I am going back to bed, wants to come up as well. Gets excited, pees herself.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0930<\/strong>. Take everyone downstairs again. Mail has fallen in pee. Mop up pee. Put mail on radiator to dry.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0940<\/strong>. Cup of tea is cold. Adobe plug-in has crashed, Windows 7 no longer recognises sound card. Restart everything. Put tea in microwave. Microwave is full of raw minced chicken defrosting for dogs. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Labrador wants to go into garden. Trip over labrador.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_753\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-753\" style=\"width: 434px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"753\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/pups1\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?fit=1424%2C1068&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1424,1068\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;2.8&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;FinePix E550&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1075165407&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;7.2&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;320&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.016666666666667&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"pups1\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?fit=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?fit=474%2C356&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-753\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?resize=434%2C325\" alt=\"pups1\" width=\"434\" height=\"325\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?w=1424&amp;ssl=1 1424w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups1.jpg?w=948 948w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 434px) 100vw, 434px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-753\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">a boy and his teddy<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>0950<\/strong>. Start writing.<\/p>\n<p><strong>0955<\/strong>. Stop writing when remember that <em>greydogtales<\/em> was supposed to go out this morning. Find that I have saved most pieces in the wrong folders, and lost half the article. Search folders with increasing sense of despair.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1005<\/strong>. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>. Longdogs want to go for a walk. Tell them I am master here and they will have to wait. Put kettle on for hot cup of tea.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1007<\/strong>. Going insane due to high-pitched whining noise penetrating entire house. Take dogs out.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1115<\/strong>. Get back plastered in mud, with soaking wet shoes. Go upstairs to change. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Labrador thinks it is nap time. Try to go to toilet before labrador starts climbing the stairs herself. Too late. Abandon toilet. Turn labrador around half way up, tumble down step by step. Hit head on door. Longdogs think we are going out again. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_754\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-754\" style=\"width: 438px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"754\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/chillsted\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?fit=1424%2C1068&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1424,1068\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;3.6&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;FinePix E550&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1075167854&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;13.5&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;200&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.016666666666667&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"chillsted\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?fit=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?fit=474%2C356&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-754\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?resize=438%2C329\" alt=\"chillsted\" width=\"438\" height=\"329\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?w=1424&amp;ssl=1 1424w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/chillsted.jpg?w=948 948w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 438px) 100vw, 438px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-754\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">a girl who has stolen someone else&#8217;s teddy<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>1135<\/strong>. First hot cup of tea. An unknown computer error has occurred. Also, unwanted McAfee Anti-virus programme now using all CPU memory. Woman phones to say she is not selling anything. Tell her that I am, and she rings off.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1140<\/strong>. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>. Male longdog thinks it is lunchtime. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Labrador believes him. Gets excited, pees herself. Man knocks at door offering to cut our trees down. Go to door, trip over labrador. Tell man I have less money than he has. Would he like to buy a short story? Man leaves.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1155<\/strong>. Start writing.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1200<\/strong>. Realise I am editing wrong version of story. Find right one filed with missing blog pieces, note on cost of Edwardian cutlery and photograph of a sea-cucumber. Can&#8217;t remember why that&#8217;s there.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_752\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-752\" style=\"width: 428px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"752\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/pups2\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?fit=1424%2C1068&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1424,1068\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;2.8&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;FinePix E550&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1075103196&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;7.2&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;100&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.016666666666667&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"pups2\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?fit=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?fit=474%2C356&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-752\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?resize=428%2C321\" alt=\"pups2\" width=\"428\" height=\"321\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?w=1424&amp;ssl=1 1424w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups2.jpg?w=948 948w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 428px) 100vw, 428px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-752\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">teddy-less, a boy turns to drink<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>1205<\/strong>. Londogs, bored again, pull stuffing out of armchair and throw it all over living room. Labrador looks as if she has been wading through deep snow. Pick up stuffing. Uncover and brush down labrador. Count number of legs etc.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1220<\/strong>. Start writing.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1225<\/strong>. Back hurts from moving labrador up and down stairs. Lie on floor, am joined by three dogs who think this is game. Try using computer pad to write on. Battery too low. Something I don&#8217;t recognise has crashed. Male longdog sits on me. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>. He thinks this game is boring.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1240<\/strong>. Stand up. Trip over labrador. <strong><em>Bark bark bark<\/em><\/strong>. Labrador is hungry. Now both longdogs think it is lunch-time. <strong><em>Whine whine whine<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1245<\/strong>. Try to check e-mail. Adobe plug-in has crashed. Optical mouse full of dog hair. Restart everything. Abandon cup of tea and give to labrador.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_755\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-755\" style=\"width: 435px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"755\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/nice-cuppa1\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?fit=2136%2C1602&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"2136,1602\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;2.8&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;FinePix E550&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1072915269&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;7.2&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;200&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.016666666666667&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"nice cuppa1\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?fit=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?fit=474%2C356&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"wp-image-755\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?resize=435%2C326\" alt=\"nice cuppa1\" width=\"435\" height=\"326\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?resize=300%2C225&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?resize=1024%2C768&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?w=948 948w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/nice-cuppa1.jpg?w=1422 1422w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 435px) 100vw, 435px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-755\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">a girl gets her own cuppa at last<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><strong>1255<\/strong>. Another productive morning is over. A fatal error has occurred in my writing career. <strong><em>Sob sob sob<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">####<\/p>\n<p>And that&#8217;s why so many children these days dream of being writers and owning dogs. What can being a fire-officer or an astronaut offer in comparison to the thrills of a career with<strong> longdogs<\/strong>, <strong>lurchers<\/strong> and <strong>other monsters<\/strong>?<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>On greydogtales before Christmas: Cracking features on renowned illustrator and writer John Coulthart, and on the talented Danish folk-lore artist Jorgen Bech Pedersen. We might pack in some more bits over the festive period if we have the energy left&#8230;<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s an all-dog post today, before we drift back to some stupendous weird art and illustrators. We present some of the greydogs pack, and offer you A Morning With: J Linseed Grant Being a writer isn&#8217;t all about exciting awards ceremonies and expensive yachts. Today we are delighted to be joined by man-about-town, fashion icon &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"iawp_total_views":5,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[2,21],"class_list":["post-748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-longdogs","tag-lurchers"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It&#8217;s an all-dog post today, before we drift back to some stupendous weird art and illustrators. We present some of the greydogs pack, and offer you A Morning With: J Linseed Grant Being a writer isn&#8217;t all about exciting awards ceremonies and expensive yachts. Today we are delighted to be joined by man-about-town, fashion icon &hellip; Continue reading Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts &rarr;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"greydogtales\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2015-12-15T10:55:44+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2016-01-04T21:25:50+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31-300x185.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"greydogtales\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"greydogtales\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"5 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\",\"name\":\"Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31-300x185.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2015-12-15T10:55:44+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2016-01-04T21:25:50+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/1c2413a29a9d04fbc9280c12fdf7b151\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=1386%2C856&ssl=1\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=1386%2C856&ssl=1\",\"width\":1386,\"height\":856},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#website\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/\",\"name\":\"greydogtales\",\"description\":\"Literature, lurchers and life\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/1c2413a29a9d04fbc9280c12fdf7b151\",\"name\":\"greydogtales\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/33b1544bc8676700f4c33c9ed5475632?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/33b1544bc8676700f4c33c9ed5475632?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"greydogtales\"},\"description\":\"John Linwood Grant writes occult detective and dark fantasy stories, in between running his beloved lurchers and baking far too many kinds of bread. Apart from that, he enjoys growing unusual fruit and reading rejection slips. He is six foot tall, ageing at an alarming rate, and has his own beard.\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/author\/greydogtales\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/","og_locale":"en_GB","og_type":"article","og_title":"Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales","og_description":"It&#8217;s an all-dog post today, before we drift back to some stupendous weird art and illustrators. We present some of the greydogs pack, and offer you A Morning With: J Linseed Grant Being a writer isn&#8217;t all about exciting awards ceremonies and expensive yachts. Today we are delighted to be joined by man-about-town, fashion icon &hellip; Continue reading Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts &rarr;","og_url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/","og_site_name":"greydogtales","article_published_time":"2015-12-15T10:55:44+00:00","article_modified_time":"2016-01-04T21:25:50+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31-300x185.jpg","type":"","width":"","height":""}],"author":"greydogtales","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"greydogtales","Estimated reading time":"5 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/","url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/","name":"Lurchers for Writers - A Tragedy in Too Many Parts - greydogtales","isPartOf":{"@id":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31-300x185.jpg","datePublished":"2015-12-15T10:55:44+00:00","dateModified":"2016-01-04T21:25:50+00:00","author":{"@id":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/1c2413a29a9d04fbc9280c12fdf7b151"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=1386%2C856&ssl=1","contentUrl":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/pups31.jpg?fit=1386%2C856&ssl=1","width":1386,"height":856},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/lurchers-for-writers-a-tragedy-in-too-many-parts\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Lurchers for Writers &#8211; A Tragedy in Too Many Parts"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#website","url":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/","name":"greydogtales","description":"Literature, lurchers and life","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/1c2413a29a9d04fbc9280c12fdf7b151","name":"greydogtales","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"http:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/33b1544bc8676700f4c33c9ed5475632?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/33b1544bc8676700f4c33c9ed5475632?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"greydogtales"},"description":"John Linwood Grant writes occult detective and dark fantasy stories, in between running his beloved lurchers and baking far too many kinds of bread. Apart from that, he enjoys growing unusual fruit and reading rejection slips. He is six foot tall, ageing at an alarming rate, and has his own beard.","sameAs":["http:\/\/greydogtales.com"],"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/author\/greydogtales\/"}]}},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6sRRV-c4","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":7509,"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/clarks-world-the-willvent-bin\/","url_meta":{"origin":748,"position":0},"title":"CLARK\u2019S WORLD: THE WILL\u2019VEN\u2019T BIN","author":"greydogtales","date":"November 5, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"We\u2019re always pleased to see a new book from Alan M Clark, not only a talented author but also, as it happens, an award-winning artist. The Will\u2019ven\u2019t Bin, just out from IFD Publishing (15th October), joins his other intriguing historically-set works, this time with a Young Adult focus and science\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"alan m clark","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/11\/EbookCover_TheWillventBin_small-200x300.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2610,"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/shades-of-sherlock-holmes-pastiche-paranormal-or-piffle\/","url_meta":{"origin":748,"position":1},"title":"Shades of Sherlock Holmes: Pastiche, Paranormal or Piffle?","author":"greydogtales","date":"August 17, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"In which we consider the Holmes pastiche, for better or for worse... Holmes forced more of the vile Turkish tobacco into his pipe, wincing as he realised that yet again he was smoking the damnable stuff in order to keep up appearances. \u201cDespite the fact that you are secretly my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"sherlock holmes\"","block_context":{"text":"sherlock holmes","link":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/tag\/sherlock-holmes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Huty1913428","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/sherlock-holmes-basil-rathbone-300x200.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":7318,"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/scotland-the-strange-the-eyes-of-doom\/","url_meta":{"origin":748,"position":2},"title":"SCOTLAND THE STRANGE: THE EYES OF DOOM","author":"greydogtales","date":"January 24, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"This week, in honour of Burns Night, which celebrates Scottish poet Robert Burns (25 January 1759 \u2013 21 July 1796), our greydogtales site begins a ramble through the subject of Scottish supernatural\/horror and related cultural stuff. We\u2019ll have some classic tales, new material, guest reviews of some really bad films\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"SCOTLAND THE STRANGE","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/01\/Ben_Lomond_from_Beinn_Narnain-300x163.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4071,"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/fables-disappearances-untethered-tales-gwendolyn-kiste\/","url_meta":{"origin":748,"position":3},"title":"Fables and Disappearances: The Untethered Tales of Gwendolyn Kiste","author":"greydogtales","date":"May 29, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Today, dear listener, we have loss and identity; clarity and hope; the core of writing, style, Angela Carter and some dark, magical stories. When we thought about interviewing author Gwendolyn Kiste, we realised we wanted to burrow behind her work a bit, so we went there.\u00a0 Though we centre on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"interviews\"","block_context":{"text":"interviews","link":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/tag\/interviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"SONY DSC","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/And-Her-Smile-Will-Untether-the-Universe-Gwendolyn-300x201.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4232,"url":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/shiela-crerar-clay-corpses-psychic-investigation-girls\/","url_meta":{"origin":748,"position":4},"title":"Shiela Crerar, Clay-Corpses &#038; Psychic Investigation for Girls","author":"greydogtales","date":"July 20, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"\u201cOh, you modern women! You dabble in science and medicine, you dabble in politics and law, and now you dabble in the occult. What else is there left for mere man?\u201d Today we get lost in Scotland and its folklore with Shiela Crerar, follow a plucky young woman's psychic endeavours,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In \"classic horror\"","block_context":{"text":"classic horror","link":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/tag\/classic-horror\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"shiela crerar","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/doll-626790_960_720-300x200.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/748","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=748"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/748\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":762,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/748\/revisions\/762"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=748"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=748"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/greydogtales.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=748"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}